"The book I needed three years ago."
A SEND PARENT, THREE YEARS OUT OF SCHOOL
You are not failing.
Not Refusing.
Unable.
The UK parent's manual for school distress, EBSA, and the way through.
"The book I needed three years ago."
A SEND PARENT, THREE YEARS OUT OF SCHOOL
You are not failing.
The UK parent's manual for school distress, EBSA, and the way through.
Two readers — one who has spent forty years sitting with families, and one who has stood at his own kitchen table watching his child struggle to walk through the school gates.
"Behind every absence is a story. Not of defiance, as it is so often labelled, but of distress. This book speaks directly into that space — and gives families pathways they did not know they had."
"I have sat at my own kitchen table watching my child struggle to walk through the school gates. This book names what is really happening. Sometimes, that is exactly where hope begins."
Built from twenty-five years inside the UK education system. Written to help parents organise questions and understand possible next steps. It cannot guarantee an attendance or tribunal outcome.
A discussion of lower-demand approaches at home. This is not clinical treatment or a promise of recovery within a set time.
Ways to describe barriers to attendance and discuss support without assuming defiance.
Ideas for recording relevant observations and questions for school, health professionals and the local authority.
An introduction to the local authority’s education duties and questions about suitable provision. Eligibility depends on circumstances.
How a parent can request an EHC needs assessment directly. Assessment and appeal outcomes are not guaranteed.
An introduction to education otherwise than at school. It is not an automatic entitlement whenever school attendance is difficult.
If you've just bought the book and your child is out today — this page tells you what to do this week.
Longer-term questions about education, support and suitable next steps. There is no single recovery timetable.
Forty pages of the highest-leverage tools from the book — the Three-State Tracker, the Symptom & Impact Log, the fillable Section 19 letter, and Your Situation Map. Free.
DOWNLOAD THE FREE WORKBOOKRead independently or talk to Stephen. You do not need to buy this book before a consultation, and there is no required progression into paid work.
STEP 1 — FREE
A free 30-minute consultation plus a short written next-step summary, normally one to two pages, based on our conversation only. It is not a document audit or legal merits opinion. Delivery timing is agreed on the call.
Free · 30 minutes
BOOK A FREE CONSULTATION →OPTIONAL — SEPARATELY AGREED PAID SUPPORT
Pre-reading of one recent document, a 60-minute call and written next steps within up to 3.5 hours of professional time. The document and scope are agreed before paid work starts.
£175 · 60-minute session + written follow-up
LEARN MORE →OPTIONAL — WIDER CONSULTANCY
From focused expert advice and EHCP applications through to appeals, tribunal preparation and representation — every service has a clearly defined scope and fixed price before work begins.
Current services and prices available online
SEE ALL PACKAGES →The free summary does not include document pre-reading, evidence audits, letters, appeal grounds, representation or ongoing casework and deadline management. Read the free-summary scope. For practical first steps, see school-distress and EBSA consultancy support.
Stephen Mallett is a former Headteacher and SENCo with twenty-five years inside the UK education system. He has led schools through inspection, overseen complex SEND provision, written and defended EHCPs, and made the calls to Local Authorities that parents are usually the wrong side of.
He is also a parent. The framework in this book is the one he reached for when his own family needed it — and the one he could not find on a shelf.
He is the founder of SEND Navigate, which provides specialist EHCP and tribunal advisory support to families and the See It. Support It. Teach It. SEND training programme to schools and MATs.
He is the author of Parent Shield, the first volume in The SEND Navigate Library.
The book has a final chapter on this — The Other Side of the Table. SEND training for school staff is not statutory in the UK in the way it is for NHS staff. See It. Support It. Teach It. is the SEND Navigate programme that closes that gap.
You are welcome to forward the chapter, or the book, to your SENCo. A one-page programme overview is available at the link below.